Friday, September 22, 2006

Shirali Muslimov turns 201

It was Shirali Muslimov's birthday on September 4. Yeah, I know, I forgot too. But if you didn't send a present it's ok, he died in 1973. And while it's too bad the old codger is dead, he was causing a birthday candle shortage, plus that darn cake was a fire hazard.

For a while in the 1970s, many old timers from Azerbaijan were going around claiming that they were very old. Like, really, really, ancient. This might seem strange in our youth-obsessed culture, but these people would routinely tell others that they were well over 120. I don't know why they did this. I can just imagine their conversations,
"You're 129? Well I happen to be 136 years old."
"Oh yeah? Well I am in fact am 142 and used to be Napoleon's valet."
And this sort of thing would go on for hours.

The king of these old timers was Shirali Muslimov who died on September 4, 1973 at the purported age of 168 years, allegedly making him the oldest man that ever lived, aka, the world's oldest man. His birth certificate read 1805, which made him 168 at the time of his death. He claimed to have fathered a child at the age of 136, which of course provokes some interesting questions of the who would be mating with a man of that age.

Muslimov spend his incredibly long life in the village of Barzava, 150 miles south of Baku, in the hilly Shiral region near the Iranian border. He didn't leave his village much, so you can assume that he got to see the whole town before he died.

Experts consider that the longest a human can live is 115 years old give or take a few shakes of the hourglass. But many Azeris insist that their grandmother lived to 136 or 141. The proper reply to these claims is to boast that your granny lived even older.

But Muslimov (aka Mislimov) put Azerbaijan on the map as a place where people live to a ripe old age and there is some evidence that certain people in the hills live to an extreme old age and interantional experts are still getting grants to poke around into the reason behind this.

But Muslimov caught everybody's imagination. The Soviets loved this old Talish shephard for representing their claims of superiority. Danone yogourt also loved him as he inspired a successful advertising campaign attributing extreme longevity in the Caucasus to the comsumption of yogourt. National Geographic wrote about his great age, although they later recanted and suggested that he might not be as old as he claimed. The Azeri government put him on a stamp in 1994. So if all these people loved the old coot, who are you not to?

I hereby suggest that September 4 be hereafter marked by the United Nations and celebrated as the Shiraz Muslimov International Day of Longevity and Celebration of Centenarians and I think you should listen to me, as I am a wizened old man of 143 years of age.


Blogger Urileye said...


6:15 PM  
Blogger mike scott said...

Is anyone old enough to remember back in the mid to late 60's when a man was interviewed on a fishing pier by a TV reporter and thru an interpretur he was known to be the oldest person in the world at that time. He said "the reason I have lived so long is that I was never in a hurry to live and now I am not in a hurry to die". As I recall he was about 160 at the time, being born around 1805. I could see clearly that he was a little heavier than most and had more wrinkles than anyone I could ever recall except Methuselah (but without the beard he had at 969 y/o).

6:06 PM  
Anonymous a young man said...

roflcopter and lfmao

so he's the oldest man ever..or the best lier ever :))

5:31 PM  
Blogger Joanna April Lumbad said...

It's an inspiration for all of us that there can be a person who will reach this unexpected longest age. He is the legend. At first I did not believe, but when I've started to do a research about the historical people & places, at that moment I was in shocked that this could possibly happen in real life. Since the weather is now changing in this generation, a lot of old people can't live or stay longer. Some old people die at the age of 70's, 80's and few of them die at the age of 90's, but seldom/rare of the people reach 100's. During the Ancient Times up-to 1900's the earth has perfect ozone layer unlike in the 21'st Centery the ozone layer has been destroyed and there a lot of calamities/ natural disasters happening and we don't know if the Mayan Calendar is actually true that it gonna be the end of the world in 2012 and I hope it's not. Anyway, too much details...haha! In short all I can say right now:
Shirali Muslimov is sooooo unbelievably COOL!

5:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow i wish i live like him long life
from new zealand Mickael askerov

8:51 PM  
Anonymous centurian seeker said...

Would you change the yellow words to blue or something else? At the moment your writing is interesting but unable to read yellow. Why not live to 165, that's awesome.

8:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Once you scramble this egg it's hard to undue the color.
Your question of who would want to have sex with a man 135 years old, well I guess in this instance a young woman, still of a child bearing age for her. I personally know a lot of woman like that, as for me in the last forty years I have not been able to find one, its just a matter of luck. I once met a man older than me that had six fingers on both hands and also his feet, he had no trouble because woman thought it was supernatural or something, and it would lead to a race of super beings, who knows but he was certainly not handsome like me. Every day that goes by allows you to live longer, if you will it, it will be so, too many eventually wear themselves down to a point that they can't posses the inner strength to do the same things, causing age and death.

3:29 AM  

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